Monday, June 23, 2014

Craigslist Dress Scam

The gown.
There is is...creeping me out everytime I look upon it. It just hangs there in the playroom closet. Waiting. Watching. Reminding me. In a twisted irony it doesn't fit me anymore - much like the marriage it represented - it just didn't fit. Looking at it sends me into a panic attack. Pass me a drink! UGH!  It was time. Time to hit this bitch to Craigslist.

How do you price a gown bought in 2000? I am sure I paid well over $1200.00 for it at the time. It was the third dress I tired on while at Bridals By Lori in Atlanta, Georgia. Now, if you are a TLC watching fan you will know exactly what store I am talking about.

Yes, this woman who wants to "Jack you up.." for Prom made a quick sale out of me and my Mom the day I came in for my gown. She knows her shit and she found my dress in 10 minutes. It was a done deal before I even looked at anything on my own. It was a "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" for wedding gown purchases. NOT - the elaborate display they do for the show. I must not have paid enough for that.

I loved my dress, at the time. Looking at it now turns my stomach. It also is not ANYTHING I would pick for myself now. I don't ever see myself in a gown that large and puffy. It had a cathedral length train that was detachable and bead work and a terrible amount of layers underneath. I recall the one time I used the restroom in it. I needed three of my bridesmaids to help me. Yeah, the dirty work of a bridesmaid - hold my dress so it doesn't fall in the toilet. Great! Yeah, now I would find something much more fitted and simple and maybe short- more me. This dress - is so not me. I would NOT say YES to this dress EVER AGAIN.

When I took the dress from the house Mr. Ex Swag said to me , "Hey, don't sell that, you may want to give it to your daughter one day or wear it when you get married again." WTF?!?!?! Of all the stupid shit I have heard in my life this topped them all.  I stopped and about lost my lunch at that statement. Collected my thoughts and turned to reply.  I had to.
"Um, ok Mr. Ex. Swag - you are assuming a whole shit ton here.
1. Assuming I get pregnant again.
2. Assuming I have a baby girl.
3. Assuming I get married again.
4. Assuming I will WANT to wear a dress I was married to my EX in?!?!?!
5. Assuming my fictitious daughter will want to wear a dress made out of the material I was married to my EX in!?!??!
6. That is the craziest thing I have ever heard - ugh!",

It had to be the strangest thing to fall out of his word hole, that I had heard,  in a while besides; "I don't find you attractive anymore." - that has to top it. LOL - Ahh good times.

ANYWAY.....so here I am with his dress and about to move AGAIN. Like hell I am hauling this beast to another closet. Its time to sell it.  So, I set it up on Craigslist. I got a few messages but no one followed through. Then a text on a Saturday night - at midnight.

This guy, "David", he named himself. HAHA - as in David's Bridal I am assuming. Anyway, David wanted my dress, but lives out of state. This is where it gets weird. I know its Craigslist - I should expect weird- but I think he was using me to launder money. He wanted me to do the following:
1. Meet a shipper he just arranged (at midnight mind you) at any location I choose.
2. Was going to put $1250.00 in my paypal account on Monday, hours before I meet the shipper. This is $400 above my sale price.
3. Take the extra $400 to pay the shipper
4. Keep the $850
 Instantly my mind went..JIGGA WHAT!?!??!??! JIGGA WHO?!?!?!??!?!?!

  Ok, that was a nice dance break - always love a little Jay-Z in the afternoon. 

But, hold up......something here DID NOT feel right.  I mean, I am supposed to front $400 cash to a shipping company to ship a wedding dress? David can't pay them on credit card in advance? Who charges $400 to ship a dress? And Bekins Movers (the company David said he is using) is a moving company not shipping. So my fear is that I would front $400, give my dress, and the money he sends never clears Paypal. So I am out a dress and $400. YEAH- sorry David you are out of luck. 

So I text him back that I don't feel comfortable with this and its a no go. He replies "I am a God Fearing Christian and I would do nothing against God's will." Yeah, this was a HUGE red flag and I knew I made the right choice. Whenever someone brings up their religion as a reason to trust them I usually start to back away quickly.  My reply "That's great, good for you. But my will says not to do this. No sale! Sorry." 

That was the last time I heard from David.  I hope he found a wedding dress. 

So, my dress is still here..waiting to move on....maybe I should try Ebay?

As much as I want to cut loose of this dress, I couldn't fall for this slimy scam. This dress represents my past - and its not who I am now. This dress filled with fancy beads, tons of fabric, that weighed heavy on my shoulders is not me, and truly never was.  I am a happier, simpler, lighter now, and wouldn't have it any other way. I know this dress has a home somewhere, just like my past has a home in my mind where I don't think about it much. I move forward seeing the good ahead and don't let a huge, over beaded wedding gown slow me down anymore. And its all good ;) 
The back - kiss my ass dress - its time for you to find a new home!
 I truly wish the dress all the best. I hope you had the time of your life in my closet for the last 14 years. LOL

 Stay tuned, I swear I will write more  :) Maybe even a vlog again...LOL. Fingers crossed. :) 
Swag on my friends!
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SMILES TO ALL :) 
Swaggermom! :)